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Backwards Prostitute

from Don't Call Me an Artist by -k

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lyrics

Well me and my band we got a hundred likes
Up on our facebook page
And our friends and family
They say that we’re the latest rage
And currently we’re number three
Up on the reverbnation
And we done it all without getting a song
On the local radio station…. Whoop-dee-doo
Well last week I opened for a hard core band
At some down town club on a Tuesday night
And they was wanting me to pitch em 25 dollars
For promotional costs- you know, like an online invite….
So I paid, and the show got delayed
On account that there was only three people at the bar
You see the band was holding out for a crowd to come along
To put money in their tip jar
And they we’re singing,
“Now listen to me, listen to me,
I’m giving away my dignity.
I’m paying a fee and I’m playing for free
So you can come and listen to me.
I’m kinda like a backwards prostitute
I’ll give you fifty dollars and do a trick or two
Cause I just wanna hear a bunch of people screaming:
I love you.”
Well lately I’ve been frequenting the local open mics
And I’ve been singing songs I wrote about the meaning of life
And last week I made it through the second verse
Before the folks in the crowd turned on their smart phone lights
So yeah you might say that I’m getting pretty big
I got a friend who’s got himself a home recording rig
And we’ve been laying down some pretty far out tunes
That we can’t even replicate at any live gig
So buy our cds, and listen to me
I’m giving away my dignity.
I’m paying a fee and I’m playing for free
So you can come and listen to me.
I’m kinda like a backwards prostitute
I’ll give you fifty dollars and do a trick or two
Cause I just wanna hear a bunch of people screaming:
I love you.
Well I wish some little hipster kid would discover me
So they could brag to all their friends how they’re ahead of the scene
Yeah but then when all their friends start thinking I’m cool
They’ll probably leave me saying, “He’s old news.”
But I’ll be waiting in their itunes closet
Like an old favorite pair of shoes.
Where I’ll be singing,
“Now listen to me, listen to me,
I’m giving away my dignity.
I’m paying a fee and I’m playing for free
So you can come and listen to me.
I’m kinda like a backwards prostitute
I’ll give you fifty dollars and do a trick or two
Cause I just wanna hear a bunch of people screaming:
I love you.”

credits

from Don't Call Me an Artist, released October 31, 2015

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all rights reserved

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about

-k Hurdland, Missouri

i sing songs that pop in my head.
I record them so i can forget them.
Here they are.
Enjoy.

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